As painful as anxiety is to live with, I have found that it is somewhat manageable. Here are 5 ways that I take charge of my anxiety, and hopefully some of these will help you, too.
1. Be selfish
If you are like me, then competitiveness is something that hits hard. And with that competitiveness comes an anxious desire to WIN, and if we don't, we hate ourselves for it. But, there is a method that I have started using which really works with combating this competitive streak in me, and that is to quite simply be selfish. Sounds odd, I know, but let me explain:
I study Interior Design, and a lot of what I do has a competitive edge to it. Although we are all working independently, there is what they call 'healthy' competition in the class. However, this is not healthy for me. In fact, it gives me the wrong motivation, because instead of trying to improve myself, I try to outdo others. At the end of 2017 I tried something that did wonders for my anxiety with regards to varsity...I stopped looking at other people's work. I became selfish; I focused on my work, what I could improve based on my ideas and not the class' work, and reminded myself that I can't always 'win'. I immediately felt less competitive, as I didn't know what I was competing against, and at the end of the year, I truly enjoyed seeing everyone's work come together, and I loved how different everyone's was!
We are not all the same, but I don't believe that anyone is better than anyone else. In 2018, focus on you and challenging yourself based on improving your own work and not trying to outdo someone else's. I'm not saying trap yourself in a bubble! Work in groups, give input and help others where you can. But don't create an obsession with doing better than everyone else! It's unhealthy and, quite frankly, not worth it. Everyone will get their moment, but no one person is destined to win ALL THE TIME. Be a little selfish and build your confidence...there's nothing wrong with a little self improvement!
2. Start a mood tracker
I feel genuinely lost without my mood tracker! In it, I document how I'm feeling that day (anxious, happy, down, etc) and what I did that day. I can then immediately see my triggers, ie: what made me feel that way, and I can then work to cut that habit out of my life, or gain a positive attitude towards it. This has helped me discover toxic relationships, bad habits, and even genres of movies to rather not watch. Which brings me to the next point:
3. Movies and music
It has been shown that media has a very strong effect on your mood. I remember when a friend of mine documented heart rate based on different genres of music, and it was scary to see the results, and how everyone's differed. Certain music and movies makes me feel uncomfortable and I have realized that they aren't worth the anxiety that accompanies them. If a movie or song negatively affects you, discard it! Don't allow toxic things into your heart.
As someone with anxiety, I have also noticed that I love watching the same things over, and over, and over...It may be because I feel comfortable with what I know and what is certain. But if this is also you, don't be ashamed by it! I have watched certain series about 7 times, and so what? If it makes you happy, you should never apologize for it.
4. Hour a day
This is probably one of the best things I have done for myself, and I know it'll help you too. No matter how busy your day is, how much earlier you have to wake up or how much later you have to go to bed, take an hour every day for YOU. Do anything that makes you relax, but focus all your energy on yourself. Do a workout, art, go for a manicure...it doesn't matter what you do. But take that time for you. Your mind, heart and body will thank you for it. This honestly works! In fact, a study showed that people who take even 10 minutes to drink coffee in solitude before work have a more productive and positive day. So imagine what an hour will do for you.
5. Your body is a canvas
This is the most unorthodox and effective tip I can give you. Many times I sit in class, at work or in company and my anxiety strikes. So I start to draw...on myself. It's incredible, the relief this brings, and it looks pretty good too. You don't have to be super artistic, and it doesn't even have to make any sense. It serves a powerful reminder throughout the day, too, that beauty can come out of even the darkest places, and that all situations pass.
This practice is so therapeutic, relaxing and fun! I have come up with the craziest things, and it always sparks conversation. It is also an INCREDIBLE way to stop self harm. Draw where you want to cut/burn/hit/etc. It brings relief without pain, but rather with relaxation, and you get to see something beautiful you have done, instead of something painful. Something great to try is the butterfly project! If you don't know what this is, it's explained here.
I truly hope that everyone struggling with anxiety finds some relief in 2018. Take care of yourself always, and remember that fear isn't something to fear! You can read about how to combat fear in my blog entry Be not afraid. Keep fighting, keep smiling and keep a positive outlook. You are not your disorders!!
xx
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